I know my story will or might sound similar to yours, but I will still tell my own side of the story and allow you compare and most probably learn from my own version of it
Last year, I went to this fun-filled city with my friends. We were supposed to spend five months because of a work project, but it was cut short to two months because of an urgent matter. But within the two months, that was when my own story happened.
We came into the city around 11pm, we were picked up by this very interesting guy, who we would later know to be our colleague from another branch. He wouldn’t stop making us laugh. He continued talking and we all enjoyed it. He didn’t stop until we got to the hotel that was close to a lovely island where we were supposed to stay for the five months.
The Love I thought I have found
Things started getting interesting or so I thought when he served me breakfast in bed the next morning and I said to myself, “I have finally found the one for me”. We would play all the romantic plays that have ever existed. We went to fun places together. And we also concentrated whenever we are needed at work. We continued this way, and I gradually started falling in love with him. He too was acting like one who was already in love with me. So, we continued having fun together until one day.
We went out to a lovely restaurant near the city capital, the place was decorated in a very beautiful way, with petals spread on the rug and I was made to walk on it. I felt like a princess who has just found her prince charming. Everything was so real that day, that I let my guard down and accepted him with both my body and soul. After having a very delicious meal with a bottle of champagne, we headed back to the hotel. On arriving at the hotel, he kissed my forehead and then went straight to give me a splendid kiss.
‘That kiss made me invite him to my room, because I thought it was love’.
When we got to my room, we talked for few minutes and started kissing again. But he stopped immediately I pulled off my clothes, I was surprised and then he looked at me and said “your body sucks”. I took it as a joke because he jokes a lot, but when he wouldn’t touch me or even come close to me, then I realized that he really meant what he was saying. He left my room that day and stopped talking to me.
What was wrong with my body?
What could actually make a man not to have sex with a woman he claims he loves?
This question has been on my mind and I have been searching for the answer. (I will love to hear your answers in the comment section).
My story
I am an average beautiful girl, beautiful because my friends say so, that is what I now believe, the description of what people give about me. I no longer know myself; I have long forgotten who I am.
At a very tender age, I mistakenly poured hot water on myself, when I was searching for something to eat. The hot water poured all over my body and I was very lucky to have survived it. I was given every necessary treatment but the scars wouldn’t go away.
It made my body look somehow irritating.
When I was growing up, it was very difficult for me to pull my clothes in front of my friends. These I also suffered even with all the boyfriends I have had. They would only have sex with me with the lights off or in the night when they won’t be seeing my body. I had stopped falling in love until this guy, that I thought truly loves me came by.
How quick ejaculation and weak erection almost ruin my relationship. My Solution will shock you
Maybe I will go celibate from now on, till I find the one who is truly made for me.
One thing I am learning now is to trust and love myself, although it’s difficult but I will keep trying my best.
Many people have advised me to go for plastic surgery, but I wouldn’t want anything that will change me from who I am, I have taken it to be part of what life has offered me. That is why I want to share my own story to as many people that are facing the same problem.
The Lessons
Do not allow people to define ‘who you are’ for you. Don’t allow low self-esteem to take charge of you because of someone who cannot give life to anything. Do not allow someone who doesn’t love you for who you are, to affect or change any perspective about yourself.
You are a diamond in making, you are great and nothing can ever change that. Do not be quick to change what cannot be changed, what even science cannot correct. Some of these effects or scars has come to stay, you can only try your best to accept it as who you are. Don’t let them get to you, you have places where you perfect in, why not focus on those things or aspects of your life.
Focus on what you know how to do best, and keep up with your hard work, and one day, just like Cinderella, your own prince charming or your own princess will find you.
Be strong! Because, I know you are.
Love yourself.
Continue with what you are good at and what you love doing.
And just one day, you will turn back and say to yourself, ‘I am glad I choose to love myself’.
And for those of us who come across such people, try your best to be mindful of what you say to them, some are dying silently. Never make a mockery of people with any form of disabilities or deformities. Learn to love and appreciate them, because they weren’t the cause of what happened to them. Always try to be nice.
Life learning lesson…
Indeed! Thanks, Desmond.
Ella, you are beautiful just the way you are, let no one tell you otherwise.
Thanks, Kings.
Your story is motivating……
It’s stands as an eye-opener to me actually.
Thank God you didn’t let that weigh you down.
You’re beautiful and perfect to me.
I’ll like to share my own story…..
Growing up as a child I never go out without my headtie.Why????
It’s because,I had bald head…..My hairlines weren’t inorder and were scanty,I took after my Dad.
I always hated myself each time I look at the mirror because I feel I was ugly.
Knowing the fact that my friends had better hair-looks saddens me,even more.Sometimes,they jokingly make mockery of me.
I could remember in primary 4.
During our end of the year party,every girl in my class made their hair(packing gel with donut at the end)and were all looking beautiful.I made mine too but I wasn’t convinced it was as beautiful as theirs.My mum made my hair for me,which she said was beautiful but I was so so against her handwork,even though,my Dad applauded her for it.
Like I said,I never go anywhere without my head-tie……So I went to school with my head-tie on.
When it was time to come out and dance according to our classes.My class teacher asked me to take off my head-tie.It appeared to me that I was the only one on head-tie….Obviously.
I reluctantly took it off.And immediately I did.A boy in my class said to me.”Cheta, you’re ugly.Your hair doesn’t look good on you”
Though,I wasn’t surprised because Joseph and I were cat and rat in the classroom.But that didn’t stop me from HATING myself even more.
I tried so many remedies recommended to me by some hair-dressers I do patronize,some family and friends,but all to no avail.I then,gave up on remedies.
I also,came to realize that nothing can be done about it.But before then,I came across a friend(a very handsome and classy guy)in an evening seminar, though he was my crush but I didn’t bother myself about him because I felt I wasn’t his type.He approached me first,and we exchanged pleasantries,then he told me to my face that I was beautiful…OMG!
And he was damn serious about it.
I almost melted,,,my whole body became lighter.But I just felt he was flattering me.
That’s by the way…….
But Now……I’ve accepted myself the way I am.I’ve developed self-love towards myself
I now acknowledge the fact that I was created this way,and I have to accept myself same way too.
I now move around without head-ties sometimes….
(Smiles….)
I look around and see reasons why I should be grateful to God….
Most people don’t even have the hand to tie their head-tie to their head because they don’t have hands.
Some can’t even see through the mirror because they’re blind.
So Why can’t I be thankful to God…..
Afterall Life itself is incomplete!!!!
Thanks, Cheta. Your story is also motivating and the fact that you have finally accepted self-love shows that you are a strong woman. I also love your story. Thanks for sharing your own story.
There are myriad of reasons for me to deny myself the pleasures of making love to my Lover… but your case my Dear is definitely not one….
Thanks Stephen.
“Focus on what you know how to do best” 👍🏽
Thanks Nonso. I sure will.
One of the biggest mistake one can do in this life is believing that people around us will show us the same love we have shown them….#selflove should be your priority.
I totally agree with you Henry.
Self love should come first before any other thing.
Thanks for reading