Four years later when I was in my final year in school, Ahmed traveled to the city to make money so that once I graduated from school, we will get married.
When he left, things started changing. The long distance started affecting our relationship. I couldn’t stay long again on the phone with him.
There was another person. Despite the fact that everybody realized I was for Ahmed alone, I didn’t permit it prevent me from spending time with Musa. Musa was somehow related to Ahmed and he loved me too and not just love, he kept showering me with gifts and all that I asked for. News got to Ahmed about my affair, and he returned immediately.
He wanted to hear from me if all they told him was true. I didn’t deny it because my attitude changed. He decided we should get married immediately so I can become his.
I told him if he could buy me a smartphone then we would get married. He begged that I give him time to find more money and he would buy it for me but I remained adamant.
He again drew a tattoo with blade on his right hand to show me how much he loved me. This time, it was a love symbol. But it didn’t move me, because I wasn’t into him like before.
He reminded me of the blood covenant we made in the early stage of our relationship and asked if that doesn’t matter to me anymore. I kept on demanding for a smartphone before I would listen to any of his words.
Musa was smart enough. He bought me a smartphone and gave me other things too: like clothes, bags, shoes. My father was not in support of my relationship with Musa but I didn’t care. I thought I knew what I wanted.
Ahmed had never slept with me. He always loved me and wanted our first sex to be memorable. He wanted everything to be after the wedding, so that I will still have the respect of our people.
Musa on the other hand, started asking to sleep with me. He asked how I will prove my love for him if I don’t have sex with him. He was the one showing me what love was with material things but I haven’t shown him that I love him. And to prove my love for him, I decided to sleep with him.
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Habiba started reminiscing on how she made love with Musa. “One rainy day, we were together in his parent’s house because they went out. He suggested I stay back till the rain stopped but I insisted on leaving. He then started touching me slowly and began kissing me. I liked what he was doing and so I stayed back. He advanced from kissing me to caressing my breast and then opening my shirt and unfastening my skirt.
When he noticed I wasn’t doing anything to him, he started teaching me what to do. It was very obvious that I was still a virgin. He proceeded with the romancing and afterwards leisurely and tenderly pushed his manhood inside me, I let out a sharp cry of pain. But when he continued thrusting in and out, I started enjoying it and relaxed. After that night we slept off”. Habiba wished she could tell her daughter about the experience but she couldn’t give her such details.
When she got herself back, she continued talking to her daughter again. “The walls has ears” they said. Before I could get over the enjoyment of the night I decided to sleep with him, Ahmed was already at the door thumping vigorously. When I came out the first greeting was “did you have sex with Musa?” I denied it immediately and he stared at me for what seems like thirty minutes before dashing out again.
He stopped coming to check on me. I didn’t care the slightest bit. I was having fun with Musa. After that night, we had intercourse over and over and again till I got pregnant.
When I denied I didn’t sleep with Musa, Ahmed listened but didn’t believe me. But when the rumor spread that I was pregnant, he came again and asked me, I was unable to deny it once more. I broke out crying. I was crying not because I hurt him but because Musa denied me. He said he wasn’t responsible for my pregnancy.
When Ahmed saw me crying, he just looked at me, shaked his head and left. That was the last time I ever saw him again.
Rumor had it that he traveled to a far away land to get over me. I struggled alone, with no one to help me, my father was very disappointed in me and chased me away from his house. I left to a city far away from the village and I have always avoided the village due to the disgrace.
It was during my striving period that your late father met me. We met and went gaga for one another but now he is dead.
What happened to the baby? Curious Zainab asked her mother.
Well. Zainab. the baby died. I was told that I will never bear children with any man that isn’t Ahmed’s child because of the blood covenant we made. And if any man insisted on marrying me, he will either choose to marry a barren woman or die after I give birth. When your father’s siblings learnt of this from their pastor, they loathed me with enthusiasm. Because their brother wouldn’t let me go. It was either me or he dies. So they left him to settle on his own choice.
I’m grateful he made me a mother but I regret ever making that blood covenant with Ahmed. I hope the future will be bright. Make sure you take care of your siblings, I will leave you with your aunty and will always come and check up on you all. Now go and sleep for the night has gone far.
I love you mum! Zainab said, hugged her mother and went to the room she shared with her siblings.
